Tuesday, December 16, 2008

[Tossin' and Turnin'/Turnin' and Tossin'/Tossin' and Turnin' All Night!]

The, um, surgery anxiety set in last night.  I had my pre-admission appointment, where they ran a plethora of heart, lung, and blood tests and gave me my instructions and warnings.  I think up to now, the whole concept of another surgery has been pretty abstract.  I haven't had one in 8 years, which is my all-time record (surpassing the next longest stretch by four years), so I guess I'd conveniently blocked out or muffled the memories.  Then, at home in bed, reading the booklet, the memories came flooding back.

Cue hyperventilation.

Okay, not yet, but I did get a little panicky, but I'm expecting to need to be given some kind of medicine to help me relax on Thursday.  It's official--the surgery is concrete now.  The day after tomorrow.  Yipe.

It doesn't help that I slept badly last night, either.  I dozed off around 8:15, meaning to sleep until 3 a.m., since I was too tired to work.  Unfortunately, I woke instead at midnight (thank you, crushed bladder) and couldn't get back to sleep.  I lay there for three hours.  Nothing.  Just panic.  Finally, I got up, did some work until I couldn't hold my eyes open, and I finally fell asleep...

...at 5:30 a.m.  I had to get up at 6:30 to be out the door by 7:15.

My name is Niki, and I'm one tired chica. 

Five more conferences to go, and I can go home and get some sleep.  I have to try to do what I did last night, though, since I still have to grade eleven more portfolios and study for tomorrow's Old English final exam.  Here's hoping my bladder and brain cooperate.

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