Tuesday, July 17, 2007

[Moving -- Physically and Spiritually]

The big move is this Friday, folks. Privacy and independence at last! Also, no more working for the Olive Garden. Thank goodness. Good people, very frustrating job. Plus, the nerves in my feet are going nuts.

Also, this means I can get back in church, and finally back into a church with a college age ministry, since I'll be in Spfld. I'm glad. Ever since I began this job, I've worked late on Saturday night, and while I've had Sunday off, it hasn't mattered--I'm too tired to get up! I've been letting my faith slide all for work, and I don't like what it does to me. Anyway, I'm certainly ready! Also, I've decided to just try to substitute in Springfield on my no-class days to earn grocery money. This way, I'll have my weekends to regroup, go to church, grade papers, and work on my own homework, and perhaps I'll manage to prevent a little unnecessary stress.

I love this song, particularly the version sung by Jars of Clay. Whatever you believe about Jesus is ultimately up to you, and I have no intention of preaching at you. I know quite well, even just based on my own reactions, that such tactics only turn people away. But I do want to be sure you know that I truly believe that He is the way, truth, and light, and I pray never to lose sight of that commitment and faith. I know it is not impossible--I've seen too many of those whose faith once astounded me who have turned far, far away. I'm not infallable. But by His grace, one beautiful day my pains will be gone and I'll grieve no more for those who've left this world. I'll be in the arms of the One whom my heart yearns for and for whom I've lived my life, and all the doubts, fears, and hurts will be forgotten.

If you know me, you know I've been through a good number of things, and because of my circumstances, death has never seemed something that happens to other people. It's been a reality for me, especially since my mom died in 1993. As such, it doesn't frighten me, whenever it may pass, because I have this hope and, I confess, a ready heart for that time--I get weary, at times, of some of the physical pain and painful memories.

I realize for some of you, this seems incredibly morbid. It's not--I promise! Anyway, here's the song:

All My Tears

When I go don't cry for me
In my Fathers arms I'll be
The wounds this world left on my soul
Will all be healed and I'll be whole

It don't matter where you bury me
I'll be home and I'll be free
It don't matter where I lay
All my tears be washed away

Sun and moon will be replaced
With the light of Jesus' face
And I will not be ashamed
For my savior knows my name

It don't matter where you bury me
I'll be home and I'll be free
It don't matter where I lay
All my tears be washed away

Gold and silver blind the eye
Temporary riches lie
Come and eat from heaven's store
Come and drink and thirst no more

It don't matter where you bury me
I'll be home and I'll be free
It don't matter where I lay
All my tears be washed away

So weep not for me my friend
When my time below does end
For my life belongs to Him
Who will raise the dead again

It don't matter where you bury me
I'll be home and I'll be free
It don't matter where I lay
All my tears be washed away

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